Mengumpat--When you're an innocent bystander

The nice thing about having friends who "understand" is that it'll be easier for them to correct you when you start backbiting, and vice versa.

Amalina: Tadi Amalina nampak couple tu...

Friend: Amalina, nak gossip ke? Nak mengumpat ke? Tak baik tu~~~

*~*~*

The not so nice thing is when other people don't "understand".

Especially when the "other people" are a lot older than you.

Scene #1: In an office

Person 1: Bla bla bla... tak ikhlas mintak maaf... Bla bla bla... Dia tu, saya tak puas hati... Bla bla bla

Person 2: *nods* nods*nods* Hmmm... *nods*nods*

Amalina: *feels guilty for listening*

And while this scene is happening, you just happen to be in the same room. Guilty.

"Do you want to stop the backbiting or not?"

"Will it seem rude if you stop the person from going too far?"

"I mean, really, the person is your parent's colleague, you need to show some respect..."

"But, what he's doing is wrong."

*~*~*

Scene 2: At your relatives's house.

Person 1: Bla bla bla... That Indian kid... Bla bla bla... Office politics... Bla bla bla... The boss is unfair... Bla bla bla...

Person 2: *nods*nods*nods*laughs*nods*nods*

Amalina: *feels guilty for listening*

"Do you want to stop the backbiting or not?"

"But that person is your older relative! Won't it be rude if you stop her?"

"Then again, what she's doing is wrong!"

*~*~*

Fuh.

It's hard. If you interrupt the adults speaking, you'd be labeled as rude, "kurang ajar", "tak hormat orang tua", "mak bapak tak ajar".

Imagine this:

Person 1: Bla bla bla... Saya tak puas hati... Bla bla bla... Dia mintak maaf tak ikhlas... Bla bla bla...

Amalina: Err... Assalamualaikum encik. Mintak maaf, saya tak kenal siapa yang "mintak maaf tak ikhlas" tu, tapi boleh tak encik jangan cakap benda tak elok belakang dia? Mungkin dia memang tak baik, atau banyak buat salah, saya tak deny tu pakcik, tapi cakap buruk pasal orang lain pun tak elok jugak pakcik.

Person 1: Kau ni siapa? Hah? Anak you? *budak ni, mak dia tak ajar dia ke?*

*~*~*

LOLZ.

Perit. Sakit. Guilty.

The thing I dislike about this is that YOU yourself might get "dosa free" for listening to these people backbiting.

Yeah, dosa free.

Pahala tak banyak mana, dah nak tambah dosa free. Hebat.

*~*~*

This is what you call "selemah-lemah iman".

You can't stop the backbiting with your actions, nor your words, so the least you can do is hate it within your heart.

And then go back home and complain in your blog.

Conclusion:

If you're old, or an adult, and you feel like backbiting people, please don't do it in the presence of other (younger) people. They don't want to get free dosa.

Sometimes young people are embarassed to tegur older people, because they're supposed to be "wiser". Out of respect, young people are keeping mum about the things older people do.

So please, if you're old, act wise. Because sometimes you're making the younger people feel uncomfortable.


Behold, you received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things which you had no knowledge; and you thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of God (24: 15)

It might seem small to your eyes, but it's big in Allah's view.

Takut kan?

Well, awak tak takut takpe. Biar orang lain takut.